Evo vam full no-lajferski način kako prići djevojci (Vedo mi je svjedok koji sam no-lajfer)
(idem nešto na fazon dijaloga ;D)
Prilazim joj, ona se isteže poput sajle, a meni samo što oči ne ispadnu.
"Pozzzzz." - kažem joj. Strese se.
"WTF ?" - opet izvalim. Čudno me gleda. 'Uprsko sam' - pomislih.
"Ovaj, ne bih da te ofo-ono, l33t style furam, al' ovaj, sviđaš mi se k'o heal na paladinu." - gleda me cura, te smeđe oči ne kontaju šta ja pričam.
"Dobro, šta misliš da mi malo restoramo HP i manu, pa onda da popijemo koji potion za resistance i pomalo boostamo statse a kasnije da idemo praviti vojsku za Raid na Lich Kinga ?!"
Opet me čudno gleda. 'Failam' - pomislih.
Spuštam pogled, smišljam sljedeće gluposti.
"Ovaj, ja sam sad pred tobom k'o warrior pred skillanim frost mejdžom, ili k'o n00b CS-g33k protiv pr0 playera. Ne znam bil' hod'o ili kupov'o alatke."
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Sex chat :
Ja : Pozz curko, šta se radi ?!
Ona : O momak ...
Ja : Šta imaš na sebi ?!
Ona : Crvene tangice, bijeli brushalter koji polahko skidam.
Ja : Ček ček bona, nisam se naoružao.
Ona : A?
Ja : Moram da popijem potione, da boostam statse, da se spremim pa se onda duelišemo.
Ona : A?
10 sec kasnije
Ona : Jesi tu momak ?
Ja : Pazi kako pričaš sa mnom undeadov otpatku, kanterski ološu!
Ona : WTF ?!
Ja : Kada kastam holy sperm spell, nema ti spasa ... ima da ti skrešem HP za pola a da ti poburstam svu manu.
Ona : Koji
ku**c ?!
Ja : Zahvaljujući mojim Santa bootsima, mogu castati Frostbolt i Fireball istovremeno. Moji su spellovi 5 lvl, a ti si 4. Ipak, preživiš ... Imaš neki vaginalni armor.
Ona : Okej, ovo je morbidno .. bb ...
Ja : Čekaj ti n00berska
ku**o, nisam casto svoj ultimate.
Ona : Offline
Ja : I evo ga, izlazi, i to, i to, i toooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo /ERROR ERROR ERROR - Please, stop sperming monitor, or you'll be banned ! ! !
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I evo jedan custom koji sam našao na netu ... on mi je bio i inspiracija
bloodninja: Baby, I been havin a tough night so treat me nice aight?
BritneySpears14: Aight.
bloodninja: Slip out of those pants baby, yeah.
BritneySpears14: I slip out of my pants, just for you, bloodninja.
bloodninja: Oh yeah, aight. Aight, I put on my robe and wizard hat.
BritneySpears14: Oh, I like to play dress up.
bloodninja: Me too baby.
BritneySpears14: I kiss you softly on your chest.
bloodninja: I cast Lvl. 3 Eroticism. You turn into a real beautiful woman.
BritneySpears14: Hey...
bloodninja: I meditate to regain my mana, before casting Lvl. 8 chicken of the Infinite.
BritneySpears14: Funny I still don't see it.
bloodninja: I spend my mana reserves to cast Mighty F*ck of the Beyondness.
BritneySpears14: You are the worst cyber partner ever. This is ridiculous.
bloodninja: Don't f*ck with me bitch, I'm the mightiest sorcerer of the lands.
bloodninja: I steal yo soul and cast Lightning Lvl. 1,000,000 Your body explodes into a fine bloody mist, because you are only a Lvl. 2 Druid.
BritneySpears14: Don't ever message me again you piece of ****.
bloodninja: Robots are trying to drill my brain but my lightning shield inflicts DOA attack, leaving the robots as flaming piles of metal.
bloodninja: King Arthur congratulates me for destroying Dr. Robotnik's evil army of Robot Socialist Republics. The cold war ends. Reagan steals my accomplishments and makes like it was cause of him.
bloodninja: You still there baby? I think it's getting hard now.
bloodninja: Baby?
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BritneySpears14: Ok, are you ready?
eminemBNJA: Aight, yeah I'm ready.
BritneySpears14: I like your music Em... Tee hee.
eminemBNJA: huh huh, yeah, I make it for the ladies.
BritneySpears14: Mmm, we like it a lot. Let me show you.
BritneySpears14: I take off your pants, slowly, and massage your muscular physique.
eminemBNJA: Oh I like that Baby. I put on my robe and wizard hat.
BritneySpears14: What the f*ck, I told you not to message me again.
eminemBNJA: Oh ****
BritneySpears14: I swear if you do it one more time I'm gonna report your ISP and say you were sending me kiddie porn you f*ck up.
eminemBNJA: Oh ****
eminemBNJA: damn I gotta write down your names or something
:D:D:D:D
)
:P:P:P:P:P